General Diversity
Questions 51-60
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THE
QUESTION:
GD60: Does racism exist in the United States to the level
shown by the film and news industries, or do they exaggerate it?
POSTED JAN. 28, 1999
Sally P., 39, female
<j.ibsgaard@get2net.dk>,
Vejen, Denmark
ANSWER 1:
That's kind of hard to answer without knowing what's being
shown on the news in your country. Can you give some examples?
POSTED JAN. 29, 1999
D.M.M., white, female
<donikam@hotmail.com>,
Charleston, SC
FURTHER NOTICE:
You can almost rest assured that unless you were watching
a historical or present-day documentary, it was exaggerated. The film
and news industries are in the business of getting people to watch
them, and racial unrest is a huge topic to spark people's
interest
POSTED MARCH 16, 1999
Kyle, 30, black male
<kyllr2v231@aol.com>,
San Francisco, CA
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THE QUESTION:
GD59: I am doing research for a class on cross-cultural birth
control methods. I keep finding things on the net that are described
as "ineffective" or "dangerous." I want to know about safe, effective
methods that are outside what the medical mainstream wants us to know
about (mostly dangerous methods in my opinion).
POSTED JAN. 26, 1999
Will G., male, Las Cruces, NM
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THE QUESTION:
GD58: What is the justification for increased penalties for
"hate crimes"? Why should an assault motivated by greed incur a
lesser sentence than one motivated by the victim's race or religion?
To me, the only mitigating factor that should be reasonably
recognized is premeditation; eg. accidental vehicular homocide vs. a
planned murder. The idea of "hate crime" smacks awefully close to
Orwell's concept of "thought crime" in my book.
POSTED JAN. 19, 1999
Jeff E., 37, male, Redondo Beach, CA
ANSWER 1:
You say the only legitimate aggravating factor in dealing
with crime is premeditation. What could be more premeditated than a
bias crime? Targeting someone as a victim just because of the way
that person looks, loves or thinks is about as premeditated as you
can get, I would think, and strikes right at the heart of an orderly,
respectful society. That's why bias crimes are treated more
forcefully (or should be).
POSTED JAN. 20, 1999
Andrew, 35, Jewish
<ziptron@start.com.au>,
Huntington , NY
FURTHER NOTICE:
What is the justification for increasing penalties for
cop-killings, multiple killings, killings during robbery, killing
children or drug-related killings? Some crimes are so heinous and
offensive that we say they should be treated more harshly. The
criteria is not always consistent. Cross-burning is protected speech
now. Cosby's kid's killer was not charged with a hate crime, even
though race played the main part in his choice of a victim, because
robbery was his main motive. The bigger danger of focusing on hate
crimes is that it allows people to falsely think "I'm not racist
because I don't use violence against X group." One civil rights
leader said he didn't worry much about Klansmen in sheets, he worried
about the ones in business suits.
POSTED JAN. 20, 1999
ACC, Mexican and American Indian, San Antonio , TX
FURTHER NOTICE 2:
If the target of a crime was targeted because of their
difference (race, color, religion, national origin, physical or
mental challanges, sexual orientation, gender) then a level of
pre-meditation has occurred. For example, in many jurisdictions,
robbing a store is a crime, as is murder. But if you kill someone
while you are in the process of committing a felony, then the statute
argues for a more severe penalty. In the military (specifically, the
Air Force), if a fight breaks out, and during the fight someone uses
a racial epithet, it may not be classified as an Equal Opportunitty
Treatment Incident (EOTI). However, if the epithet were used before
the attack, the likelihood of it being classified as an EOTI is
dramatically increased.
POSTED JAN. 20, 1999
Frank G., White Anglo-Hispanic Pagan, 31
<gonzalez1@hauns.com>,
Alamogordo , NM
FURTHER NOTICE 3:
You get mugged, hey, you were in the wrong place at the
wrong time. You get victimized in a hate crime and you are terrorized
by the idea that the assault may be the first of several. It's random
vs. personal.
POSTED JAN. 20, 1999
B. Hale, white
<halehart@aol.com>,
Hartford , CT
FURTHER NOTICE 4:
If a group of women who feel that all men are pigs decide
to get together every Friday night and lure the first man they meet
into a car and then beat the hell out of him, do you think the
distinction as to why the crime was committed would be a minor
factor? Particularly since that action will be repeated if focus is
not drawn to why it occurred in the first place?
POSTED JAN. 20, 1999
Alma, white lesbian
<pridewks@seacove.net>,
Kempner , TX
FURTHER NOTICE 5:
In America, everyone has the right to hate. In fact, the
Constitution affords each of us the right to live as inclusively or
exclusively as we choose. However, while hate itself is an individual
choice. Hateful "deeds" are different in that they are actions
against others that are punishable by law. The federal government has
a moral and ethical obligation to intervene in behaviors that are
deemed unusually viscious, inhumane, mean-spirited, unnatural, etc.
People organize their lives around their identities and beliefs, so
attacks on either become matters of common good and civil wrongs.
Annually, our country spends millions on crime prevention education,
and there is proof that most strategies, when implemented properly,
do work. For instance, we can be warned about the dangers of
traveling alone or flashing large amounts of money, etc, .but there
is no sane or reasonable way to prepare one for situations when skin
or beliefs alone present an imminent danger. It would be like telling
black people "don't be black there, but it's safe to be black over
here." The bottom line is that when hate crimes do occur, the
government has a duty to shield and protect those of us who are
willing to deal with our differences and "isms" in more civil and
humane ways. Hate crimes do receive more public scrutiny and media
attention, but keep in mind that the perpetrator is being punished
not for the hate itself but rather for the socially unacceptable and
viscious "deeds" committed - crimes often viewed as distinguishing
man from beast.
POSTED JAN. 21, 1999
Dee W. black female
<Westde@hiram.edu>,
Cleveland , Oh
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THE QUESTION:
GD57: Can someone please explain to me what the Ku Klux Klan
is all about, other than what I see on the Jerry Springer
Show?
POSTED JAN. 6, 1999
P.J., 16, Asian
<cool_pinoy8@hotmail.com>,
San Diego, CA
ANSWER 1:
I'm sure many can give you in-depth histories of the Klan.
I can only give you my definition from what I witnessed as a white
child in North Carolina in the 1960s. A bunch of cowards in
bedsheets; usually drunk, always in groups because they were too
afraid to act out their hate alone. Their primary idealogy was (and
is) to preserve the "superior white race" through terrorism of the
black community. Murders and rapes were routinely commited in the
name of white justice. And quite frankly, I don't care who this
message offends; I saw too many ugly things from these idiots. In my
opinion, they do not in any way qualify as any form of legitimate
organization.
POSTED JAN. 27, 1999
Alma, white lesbian
<pridewks@seacove.net>,
Kempner , TX
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THE QUESTION:
GD56: Would someone please explain what is so wonderful about
hip-hop music? To me, the music is generally poorly constructed, the
voices blah and the lyrics pathetic and/or crude.
POSTED DEC. 11, 1998
jprhedd
<jprhedd@hotmail.com>,
West Palm Beach, FL
ANSWER 1:
Hip Hop music is a form of poetry and the greatest form of
expression for young people around the world. African Americans
embrace this as their own, along with R&B. I and other minorities
can identify with the lyrics because they are speaking the truth. I
admit, some rappers do suck, especially the ones who talk about what
they have all day long. But a real hip hop head doesn't have to speak
about all that because the fans know his capabilities, not his
possessions or how many Benzes he has and "hasn't even drove yet."
Also, I do feel it is worth mentioning that Hip Hop is a way of life;
the music is rap. You may not understand the whole message of the
music and beats, and maybe that's why you dislike it - which is fine,
because you are entitled to your own opinion. Still, I don't dig soft
rock, rock, metal, goth, sk8 and all the others, but I'll never
disrespect your music style and taste, as you did with the
question. Maybe if you would ask in a better manner, you'll get a
better response. To each his own, remember.
POSTED DEC. 14, 1998
A. Bailey, Bridgeport, CT
FURTHER NOTICE:
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Hip-hop attracts
some and not others. Every type of music has things people like and
dislike. The very thing you don't like about hip-hop, someone else
may absolutely love. You could ask the question about anything:
Music, food, clothes, television, books, cars, etc. Different strokes
for different folks.
POSTED DEC. 14, 1998
J. Sin, white male, GA
FURTHER NOTICE 2:
Art is pure opinion. While some hip-hop is extremely poor
in all your mentioned areas, some of it is simply another way of
viewing the classical world of music, in a fast-paced manner that
keeps the attention of popular culture (which has an attention span
of all of three seconds on a good day with the wind helping them).
While few teenagers today have the patience to read Shakespeare's
classic "Romeo and Juliet," many will sit through an 18-second lyric
in Semisonic's song "Singing in my Sleep" about the story.
POSTED DEC. 14, 1998
Pop/classical/jazz/country/rap/blues music fan, Elkins Park, PA
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THE QUESTION:
GD55: How do mothers defend their sons who have been convicted
of raping/killing women? How do they balance the love they have for
their son with the fear and anger most women feel when seeing these
monsters?
POSTED DEC. 7, 1998
Eva M., 27, DINK, female
<emm1942@bjcmail.carenet.org>,
St. Louis, MO
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THE QUESTION:
GD54: To people who are undergoing or have undergone fertility
treatments: How do you justify spending thousands of dollars in an
attempt to have a baby when there are millions of children in the
United States and around the world who need families? Are other
people's children viewed as "used goods"?
POSTED DEC. 4, 1998
Heidi J., 31, childless
<heidij@ix.netcom.com>,
Simi Valley, CA
ANSWER 1:
There are several reasons people may choose to employ
artificial insemination or other fertility treatments to give birth
to children rather than to adopt children. For some, the process of
pregnancy, birthing, nursing, etc. is seen as a wondrous miracle,
nurturing and rewarding, fulfilling a primordial creative urge, a
natural affirmation of one aspect of womanhood. For others it is a
type of immortality - a continuation of a family bloodline or gene
pool. As part of the animal kingdom, humans may even exhibit some of
the lingering animal need for dominant males to ensure their own
progeny (as displayed by male lions killing the pride cubs of a prior
dominant male). Much of the concept of legitimacy and
illegitimacy is based on a traditional desire of men to ensure
inheritance (including sovereignty) to their "natural" children. Men
could have many wives and concubines, but women were expected to be
monogamous to assure indisputable paternity.
Having children of their own may also represent a visible bond
between two people who love each other - a part of a dearly loved
person that will live on after the loved one is gone. To see their
grandparents' eyes in their grandchild's face is to reaffirm their
place in the continuation of life. For lesbians, single women or
others who have either been legally prevented from adopting or
otherwise encountered prejudicial obstacles to adoption, artificial
insemination may be both a less expensive and more expedient
alternative to adoption. While there may be some potential parents
who look down on adoptable children as "bastards," "junkie's kids,"
"problem children," or "used goods," I suspect many simply want to
experience the miracle of birth. Others may be frightened by highly
publicized cases of birth parents suing to re-establish parental
rights to children supposedly given up for adoption.
POSTED DEC. 21, 1998
DykeOnByke, 48, lesbian mother and soon-to-be grandmother
<DykeOnByke@aol.com>,Southfield
, MI
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THE QUESTION:
GD53: Why is there such a stigma attached to disciplining your
children? Can a light smack (not in anger) really psychologically
harm your child? Are pleasant, obedient children not preferable to
demanding, naughty children who threaten us that if we smack them
they will "report" us?
POSTED DEC. 4, 1998
Tiffany B.
<Burbunch@bigpond.com>,
Brisbane, Queensland, Australia
ANSWER 1:
Having worked in the field of child protective services,
let me assure you that children not only do threaten their parents,
but they do call the authorities and report them. The majority of
times the calls are made by out-of-control teens seeking revenge and
more freedom. When they see the consequences of their actions
(possible foster care), it sometimes changes the story dramatically.
Probably the government has sent a wrong message to kids. On the
other hand, there are babies dying out there, and many children are
in need of protection. It is sometimes hard to know where to draw the
line.
POSTED DEC. 11, 1998
jprhedd
<jprhedd@hotmail.com>,
Palm Beach , Fl
FURTHER NOTICE:
How to punish a child is definitely not something many
people can agree on. What most parents do not know, though, is the
effect hitting or spanking can have on a child. The point that always
sticks in my mind is that children learn from adults. How can an
adult hit a child, but teach them that hitting is not an appropriate
way to act out anger? Not only does hitting a child teach them that
hitting is OK, and when you get mad at someone that is what you
should do, but it causes the child to feel a sense of fear toward
this adult. Children should look up to adults for guidance, not fear
them. A child cannot learn from someone they fear. Please think of
the alternatives to physical punishment, and help your child grow to
respect you.
POSTED DEC. 14, 1998
Dawn, female
<dawn0621@hotmail.com>,
Chicago, IL
FURTHER NOTICE 2:
The word "discipline" is derived from the word "disciple,"
which means to teach. If "smacking" is what you wish to teach your
children, that is your choice. However, acceptable behavior can be
acheived using many other (and, in my opinion, better) teaching
methods. Check your local Social Services or Community Ed. office. I
believe we'll all be a better people the sooner we treat everyone
with respect.
POSTED JAN. 4, 1999
D.B., 42, American, MN
FURTHER NOTICE 2:
My mother was left with the responsibility of raising
seven children alone, and that responsibility included discipline.
Perhaps we live in a different world than when I was a child, or
perhaps these respondents who pontificate about total abstinence from
corporal punishment live in a different world. My mother rarely
administered physical discipline as a result of an angry outburst.
Usually the "offender" was made fully aware of his/her transgression
and, of course, such punishment was only used as a last resort. It
was almost ritualistic. Neither I nor any of my siblings have turned
out to be violent savages or child abusers. Quite the opposite: I,
for one, learned from my mother's discipline that bad or harmful
behavior will have harmful (and often painful) consequences. Further,
knowing what it feels like to be on the receiving end of violence has
made me shy away from any situation in which I may be forced to
either suffer or inflict physical harm. Perhaps it is possible to
raise a child without ever laying a hand on them, but if I were to
have a child who I felt needed such a guidance supplement, I would
not hesitate to judiciously administer it
POSTED FEB. 10, 1999
Sam, 30, male, brown American
<SamAlex67@aol.com>,
Chicago , Il
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THE QUESTION:
GD52: What is the worst thing you would eat for a million
dollars?
POSTED NOV. 29, 1998
Alan N., 43
<ginoboy22@aol.com>,
Kaneohe, HI
ANSWER 1:
Meat.
POSTED DEC. 14, 1998
Young white vegetarian, Austin, TX
FURTHER NOTICE:
Chocolate- covered ants. Even with hot sauce, you couldn't
disguise the taste.
POSTED JAN. 27, 1999
Alma "get your own bag" Texan
<pridewks@seacove.net>,
Kempner , TX
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THE QUESTION:
GD51: I have recently heard people at work use the term
"jiggy" in various contexts. For instance, "Today I feel a little
jiggy," "That guy is really jiggy" or such and such a movie "was
jiggy," etc. Where did this term come from and is it cool to use, or
is it offensive? One guy told me it started on Seinfeld.
Another claimed to have heard it on The Simpsons. I am
definitely out of the loop of this one.
POSTED NOV. 27, 1998
Fjohns, Napa, CA
ANSWER 1:
Jiggy means you look nice. It means that you have on nice,
rather expensive clothing. There's another meaning for that word
also: It's a dance originated by that clown Will Smith.
POSTED NOV. 28, 1998
A. Bailey, Bridgeport, CT
FURTHER NOTICE:
To A. Bailey: Don't player-hate. There is no reason to
insult Will Smith. He brought "jiggy" to the mainstream. He is a
force to be reckoned with and admired. He is an excellent role model
- a strong, loving family man who is very successful without using
offensive language in his music.
POSTED JAN. 14, 1999
T.A., Raleigh, NC
FURTHER NOTICE 2:
Just an honest question here: What does the term "player
hate" mean? I've heard it here and there, and I have a hard time
figuring it out.
POSTED JAN. 19, 1999
John K., 25
<the-macs@geocities.com>,
Cranford, NJ
FURTHER NOTICE 3:
To player hate is to deny another person the respect they
are due, or to otherwise find some way to destroy and/or undermine
their game (whatever endeavor they are presently engaged in).
POSTED JAN. 27, 1999
Gregory, 21, black male
<december@brigadoon.com>,
MD
FURTHER NOTICE 3:
Player hate or "playa hate" means to tear someone down
because they have achieved something you find desireable that eludes
you. It has the same connotation as sour grapes.
POSTED JAN. 28, 1999
Tracy, 31, African American, female
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