Race/Ethnicity
Questions 441-450
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THE
QUESTION:
R450: For the past 12 years, we have lived in a middle-class
neighborhood. Demographics: 80 percent black, 10 percent white, 10
percent other (Hispanic, Filipino, Asian). The new high school near
our neighborhood is 65 percent black, with a majority of black
teachers. When the time came for the prom this year, the music
committee (all black students) submitted a list of 100 percent rap
music. No allowance was made for the "country" or "techno" or "rock
and roll" enthusiasts in the student body. The reaction from the
committee was: "Why should we include that other music? We're the
majority." My question: Is equality and tolerance being perceived by
our children as a one-way street?
POSTED SEPT. 7, 1998
Jackie I., 46, white mom
<hockeyrat@hotmail.com>,
West Palm Beach, FL
ANSWER 1:
I believe my white daugher, who attends a school with a 60
percent black, 10 percent Asian and 10 percent Hispanic population,
and her friends (of all races) are made to feel by some school mates
and teachers that because the black culture has been held back for so
long in the mass-culture, that now is the time to let it be at the
forefront - to the point of excluding all others. My daughter and her
friends do not attend dances, basketball games or participate in
yearbook or student council because these activities, meant to be
all-inclusive, have become solely African American. She and her
friends have been told that "they don't need to participate," and
that regarding dances, the music to be played is going to be rap and
R & B and that is that! We live in an urban setting, and my
daughter attends a school with a diverse student body because we have
chosen this, but the pendulum has swung too far to the other side,
and the white, Hispanic and Asian students are often treated
unfairly.
POSTED SEPT. 10, 1998
White female, 40, Milwaukee, WI
FURTHER NOTICE:
I believe these other (non-black) students have been
discriminated against. It is not fair for the committee to not make
musical allowances for other ethnicities. I don't believe we youth,
as a whole, see tolerance as a one-way street. I think this is a case
of people (the all-black committee) abusing their power.
POSTED SEPT. 10, 1998
Whitney T., 19, black female
<wkthomps@olemiss.edu>,
Oxford, MS
FURTHER NOTICE 2:
I've always thought of modern R&B and hip-hop as
"urban" music, not "black" music. Though the artists are generally
black, I think it is more accurate to say that the audience is
generally urba - and even that's a stretch. I grew up in an
upper-middle class neighborhood, and I was one of the only kids not
listening to these types of music. Being black, everyone
thought I was strange. So be sure to ask yourself: Is it the entire
non-black population that has a problem with the musical
selection?
POSTED OCT. 26, 1998
M.B., 19, black female
<modAgogo@yahoo.com>,
Chicago, IL
FURTHER NOTICE 3:
I am a black female who grew up during the 1970s-1980s. I
attended a predominantly Caucasian, all-girl, Catholic high school.
In 1971 it was cool to include all styles of music, as music during
that year and in the future began to change. There wasn't just rock
and roll. Now there was acid rock, country rock, the Beatles, the
Rolling Stones, Sly and the Family Stone. As a junior class member,
we voted and decided on a live band that provided our soul, R & B
and funk outlet, and then we had a D.J. come in to add variety, to
include the assorted desired styles of music that we as individuals
enjoyed. Class votes allow for equity, and the students need to
understand the power of their opinion and find alternative ways of
voicing them in order to get heard above the clamor of others who
don't really represent the majority but may merely be louder. Keep on
truckin' baby.
POSTED NOV. 2, 1998
Pamela K., black female
<P_Slaughtaire@yahoo.com>,
Chicago, IL
FURTHER NOTICE 4:
I believe the music committee was very wrong. But my
experience has been similar to Jackie's children: I live in a city
that is 65 percent Afro American, and the high school I attended
reflected those demographics. I felt many times that I was excluded
from many dances and other activities because my opinions and tastes
were not taken into consideration. Racial equality and
multiculturalism should not, and must not, be a "one-way street";
that does not create equality, it creates greater division and strife
between groups. Several friends of mine feel that it is justifiable
for blacks to exclude or mistreat members of other races and ethnic
group because it "settles the score." My opinion is that two wrongs
don't make a right.
POSTED NOV. 5, 1998
Miriam, 23, Hispanic
<mcvidal@prodigy.net>,
NY
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THE QUESTION:
R449: Over the summer in Cincinnati, police killed a black man
who was shooting at them. A woman identified as the aunt of a black
man who had killed two Cincinnati cops last December, and then killed
himself, said the police are "trigger happy." Why would someone think
this way?
POSTED SEPT. 7, 1998
Jim M., 34, white male, Cincinnati, OH
ANSWER 1:
It may be as simple as the grief-stricken statement of a
relative who has lost a loved one. Often severe loss and emotional
trauma do not equate to a high degree of logic.
POSTED SEPT. 9, 1998
S.F., black male
<sfinley@earthlink.net>,
Naperville, IL
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THE QUESTION:
R448: Has anyone ever thought about that movie, White men
can't jump, and realized if it had been called Black men can't
jump there would have been all kinds of controversy, and yet
since it referred to white men it was no problem? Why is it a problem
if blacks are put down but not if whites are put down? I'm not
racist, just curious.
POSTED SEPT. 7, 1998
Meep Beep , 17, white
<snail40@yahoo.com>,
Caledonia, MI
ANSWER 1:
We saw the movie with a white friend, and he didn't see it
as a putdown. He told us the good basketball players who jump/slam
well happen to be black, and the pure shooters, long/short range, are
white. We didn't see the movie as a putdown; Woody Harrelson shot
well and Wesley Snipes slammed-dunked well. Made a great team that
was needed to win!
POSTED SEPT. 9, 1998
A.A.W., 42, black female
<ANABWI@aol.com>,
Plantation, FL
FURTHER NOTICE:
Actually, the "putdown" was directed at blacks, not
whites. It is a very subtle, insidious type of prejudice, that is
masterful in its effect of appearing to be complimentary to
blacks rather than an insulting perpetuation of a racist myth. If
"White men can't jump," then by inference, black men can. Since being
brought to America in chains, black men have fought the stereotype
that they are bestial, jumping animals. Jumping ability is not
considered a highly valued human trait,so blacks are stereotyped as
reigning supreme in low-value, bestial skills. Considerably more
worth is attributed to a man who can think vs. one who can jump. When
you note a movie titled White men can't think, then you may
justly express concern that white people are being "put down."
POSTED SEPT. 9, 1998
Sanford F., black male
<sfinley@earthlink.net>,
Naperville, IL
FURTHER NOTICE 2:
To Sanford: Don't you think you are taking this out of
context, just a little bit? The movie is obviously about basketball
and is not some insidious reference to old perceptions of African
Americans. It is also a title that is directly related to the plot of
the movie, which refers to the fact that two cons, one white and one
black, use the urban stereotype that "white men can't jump" to make
money. You are creating a meaning that was obviously not intended,
all for the purpose of "uncovering" racist undertones. Why not just
take it at its obvious face value? (The same goes for the person who
asked the question.)
POSTED SEPT. 10, 1998
John K., 25, straight Irish-American male,
<the-macs@geocities.com>,
Cranford, NJ
FURTHER NOTICE 3:
Right on Sanford! And if I may add to your sentiment, the
movie was about the relationship between pickup basketball players, a
very narrow focus indeed. The movie was not racist nor did it have
racist undertones; consequently, the title wasn't inflammatory. Had
the plot of the movie been negative, then surely it would have been
mired in controversy. A film titled Black men can't putt
probably wouldn't be controversial, but a "racist" film with the same
title would be. In other words, its the content, not the title, that
matters.
POSTED SEPT. 10, 1998
Tony, black male
<tonyway@yahoo.com>, San
Francisco, CA
To respond
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THE QUESTION:
R447: In my opinion, most black singers display a
significantly greater capability than people of other races to
"perform a song to its fullest." Very few ethnic backgrounds can even
compete with the vocal strength of African Americans. If this is
true, is it a biological wonder, or is it due to the musical
teachings of the family?
POSTED SEPT. 5, 1998
Shanelle R., 21, white, Lexington, KY
ANSWER 1:
It's just our gospel roots based on the wailing in songs
sung during slavery times.
POSTED SEPT. 9, 1998
A.A.W., 42 black female
<ANABWI@aol.com>,
Plantation, FL
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THE QUESTION:
R446: Why do so many of the white Americans I meet tell me
what nationality they are, often going into detail, saying they're
1/24th Icelandic and so forth? I know many Indians, Russians and
Jamaicans, and I have usually found out their backround by
accident.
POSTED SEPT. 4, 1998
F.S, 24, female, African, Madison, WI
ANSWER 1:
In today's society it seems so important for people
(especially the younger generation) to fit in but yet be a little
unique at the same time. So, that may be why they are compelled to
tell you this. Another answer could be that the individual comes from
a family that has taught the individual about all of the
nationalities he or she has and was taught to be proud of them all.
So, they would feel uncomfortable if they left something out. They
don't want to appear as though one of their nationalities is more
important or better than the other.
POSTED SEPT. 10 ,1998
Regina W., Irish white female
<reginak@clt-online.com>,
Charlotte, NC
FURTHER NOTICE:
I think the idea that different nationalities or ethnic
groups have certain characteristics is part of that. For example, I
might attribute my temper to my Scotch-Irish forebears, and my
stubbornness and practicality to the German part of my ancestry. Is
this true? I don't know. Another consideration is that many Americans
are taught to be proud of their heritage so as not to disappear into
the melting pot. If you know the history of your family, you have a
better perspective on who you are.
POSTED FEB. 4, 1999
Molly S., 38, white immigrants' child, Phoenix , AZ
FURTHER NOTICE 2:
Perhaps it is to equate with our African-American brothers
and sisters. My French Canadian, American Indian, Irish and German
heritage is as important to me as an African American's heritage.
Mine is just not so obvious to the average American.
POSTED FEB. 15, 1999
Bill, 40, male, Burlington, Vt
FURTHER NOTICE 3:
I think the idea that different nationalities or ethnic
groups have certain characteristics is part of that. For example, I
might attribute my temper to my Scotch-Irish forebears, and my
stubbornness and practicality to the German part of my ancestry. Is
this true? I don't know. Another consideration is that many Americans
are taught to be proud of their heritage so as not to disappear into
the melting pot. If you know the history of your family, you have a
better perspective on who you are.
POSTED MARCH 30, 1999
Molly S., 38, white immigrants' child, Phoenix , AZ
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THE QUESTION:
R445: As the wife of a Chinese-American male, I wonder how
ethnic Chinese and other Asians prefer to have their eyes described.
My husband says he doesn't care one way or the other, but I'm
wondering if anyone has a descriptive term that isn't derogatory.
"Asian" alone doesn't work because of differences within the whole
continent. Any suggestions?
POSTED SEPT. 4, 1998
Nancy I., 38, white female, Boston, MA
ANSWER 1:
As far as I'm concerned, they (eyes) are all dark brown in
terms of color. At least for full-blooded Asians. I guess I don't see
the point in describing eyes. If you are trying to distinguish
between what part of Asia they came from, you could probably come up
with something more in-depth and interesting than the shape of their
eyes. For example, what aspects of their sub-culture are unique. The
only way I (and probably most other people) can think of to describe
their eyes would be to use the word "slant." The only problem is that
this term is considered derogatory, as you mentioned, by almost all
Asians.
POSTED SEPT. 10, 1998
Jason, Korean American
<j_pflaum@hotmail.com>,
Austin, MN
FURTHER NOTICE:
Try using "almond eyes." It's less offensive than slanty
or oriental.
POSTED SEPT. 21, 1998
Laurie, Asian, Mountain View, CA
To respond
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THE QUESTION:
R444: I am a 33-year-old white female from a small town in
Texas. Recently, my children and I got lost while driving in a big
city, and when I pulled off the freeway to ask directions, I noticed
we were in an all-black neighborhood. It scared me and I got back on
the freeway. Why did this bother me? I'm not racist and love all
people. And what should I tell my children about what happened?
POSTED SEPT. 4, 1998
C. Chance
<chance@eastland.net>,
Strawn , TX
ANSWER 1:
One needs distinguish to between racism (the belief and
expectation of inferiority, ignorance or unworthiness of another
group based solely on ethnic characteristics) and fear based on
cultural images. To fear African Americans because "they're all
violent" is racist. To recognize that the vast majority of African
Americans have little reason to love Euro-America, that those parts
of the inner city in which the social and economic system ghetto-izes
some African Americans tend to have higher incidences of violence,
and to have noticed news reports of Euro-Americans who have been hurt
by walking into the wrong place at the wrong time seems prudent when
alone with one's children at night in a strange city. All one can
tell one's children is the truth: "I was frightened. All black people
aren't violent. We were in a strange place and I felt safer getting
out."
POSTED SEPT. 9, 1998
Al, White, 59
<alarose@ncwc.edu>
Rocky Mount , NC
FURTHER NOTICE:
I believe it is a natural human instinct to feel fear when
we find ourselves in any situation where we are noticeably different
from the majority of the other people around us. As a woman in a
predominantly male profession, I have noticed uneasiness in myself
when I am in an unfamiliar work environment and am the only woman -
or one of only a few women - on site. In my mind, the difference
between normal, instinctual fear and racism is the recognition of the
fear for what it is, and a rational assessment of the actual danger
involved. My belief is that one of the biggest catalysts for bigotry
is our tendency to knee-jerk reactions, based on ancient instincts,
that are projected onto that of which we are afraid, i.e., I am
scared of you, therefore you must be bad because if you weren't I
would have no reason to be afraid. So, the fear itself isn't racist.
How you react to that fear - how you assess the true danger and the
reason for it - is what determines whether your attitude is
racist.
POSTED SEPT. 10, 1998
Laura W., white female, 37
<lauraw@cobalt.cnchost.com>,
Los Angeles, CA
FURTHER NOTICE 2:
Part of Al's respons puzzled me: "...the vast majority of
African Americans have little reason to love Euro-America..." If C.
Chance (the original questioner) had been robbed, would hatred of
Euro-Americans been blamed as the cause? I don't think so. This
assumption that all black Americans are angry and hateful at white
Americans is too simplistic. I think one should focus on the
economics of race. Not too many years ago, Irish immigrants were
considered "non-white"; it wasn't until the economic standards of
Irish immigrants improved that they "became" white (read The Wages
of Whiteness by David Roediger). C. Chance, you should ask
yourself this question: Was I frightened by the appearance of the
neighborhood (was it unkempt, rundown, etc.) and would I have felt
the same way had the inhabitants been white, or Japanese? If you
would have felt the same way, you're not racist (you were just
feeling the sentiments of how poor neighborhoods are portrayed by the
media and entertainment industries). If you would have felt safe had
the people you saw been white, then perhaps you should reconsider
your belief that you're not a racist.
POSTED SEPT. 10 ,1998
Tony, black male
<Tonyway@yahoo.com>, San
Francisco, CA
To respond
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THE QUESTION:
R443: It seems to me that white Europeans have clearer skin
complexions than white Americans. Is this generally true, and if so,
why?
POSTED SEPT. 3, 1998
Tony W., 36, black
<tonyway@yahoo.com>, San
Francisco, CA
ANSWER 1:
I've lived in Europe and have not found the above to be
true. Americans tend to be compulsive about dermatology and
orthadonture in a way Europeans aren't. Some of the worst cases of
acne I've ever seen have been among British teens. Ditto crooked
teeth. The priorities are different; the need to be physically
perfect seems to be an American fixation.
POSTED OCT. 6, 1998
Emma, Los Angeles, CA
To respond
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THE QUESTION:
R442: I am a 36-year-old black male with a shaved head and
goatee. I am 6'1" and weigh 175 lbs. Would I be frightening to a
woman alone with me in an elevator? What about walking on a downtown
sidewalk after 6 p.m.? Why or why not?
POSTED SEPT. 3, 1998
Tony W., 36, gay black male
<tonyway@yahoo.com>, San
Francisco, CA
ANSWER 1:
As a relatively small female, I would be uneasy alone with
nearly any unfamiliar male, regardless of race. The simple fact that
almost any man could overpower me if he chose to do so makes me aware
of where I am, who else is there, etc.. I would guess that most women
are uncomfortable in these situations as well.
POSTED SEPT. 4, 1998
Beth K., 38, white female, 38
<bking@nscl.msu.edu>,
Lansing, MI
FURTHER NOTICE:
As a middle-aged woman who grew up in this violent
society, I can assure you I'm very nervous about getting into an
elevator alone with any man I don't know. I'll take the stairs unless
I'm really not in a position to do that (too many flights, carrying
something heavy).
POSTED SEPT. 4, 1998
Becky, 50
<bthacker@iupui.edu>,
Indianapolis, IN
FURTHER NOTICE 2:
I would be frightened being alone in an elevator with any
man, regardless of color or length of hair. As for walking down the
street, probably not, because it's a more public place than an
elevator. In an elevator you're in an enclosed, confined place and
trapped, so to speak.
POSTED SEPT. 4, 1998
Chris R., 45, female, Lincoln, NE
FURTHER NOTICE 3:
Tony, I would probably not be frightened of you but I
would likely be very uncomfortable, because you are a man who is a
lot bigger than I am. I have to admit your race would add to my
discomfort somewhat, because I'm still unlearning childhood
prejudices picked up in the white, rural community I grew up in. As
an aside, the prevailing attitude was that we should be afraid of
blacks because they were all criminals, even though all the local
crime was committed by the white people who lived there. Pretty
stupid, huh?
SEPT. 4, 1998
Heidi J., 31, white female
<heidij@ix.netcom.com>,
Simi Valley, CA
FURTHER NOTICE 4:
I'm a white male, same height and close to 200 lbs. As a
military member my hair is always short, and sometimes in the summer
I shave it almost bald. I've noticed some people seem intimidated by
me when I have little or no hair, but not so much in the winter when
I grow it longer. I don't think our height and weight is all that
intimidating, as we're just a little bigger than average, so I
imagine it's our lack of hair. Sad as it may be, the reality is that
race is probably a factor in your case and peripherally in mine. I've
been accused of being a skinhead myself, and also told that with my
hair short I look like Tim McVeigh (Oklahoma City bomber), so this
misperception does exist on both sides of the issue.
POSTED SEPT. 4, 1998
Charles, 30, white military member
<Sw1mFast@aol.com>,
Bellevill , IL
FURTHER NOTICE 5:
No, I wouldn't normally find either situation frightening.
If there had been a recent string of assaults on women and the
assailant matched your description, that might send up a warning
flag. But generally what makes me cautious in a given situation is
not someone's looks but their behavior. If a man is either being
friendly or ignoring me, I would not likely be concerned. If he is
high, drunk, making rude comments or eyeing me like a piece of meat,
I'd likely toughen my stance and project my infamous hardnose "Don't
f--- with me" attitude.
POSTED SEPT. 4, 1998
DykeOnByke, 48, white lesbian
<DykeOnByke@aol.com>,
Southfield, MI
FURTHER NOTICE 6:
I am a female martial artist who has been interested in
women's safety and self-defense for a number of years. It doesn't
matter what you look like because women are told that the most
sweet-looking man can be a rapist or murderer. We are taught to get
out of an elevator if its only other passanger is a man, and not to
allow ourselves to be approached by strange men at any time we are
alone. If you have experienced fear from a woman in an elevator or on
a deserted sidewalk after dark, it was probably more because you are
a man than because of your race, height or appearance. With the crime
rate against women rising at four times the rate of other crimes,
it's a reasonable precaution on her part. Try not to take it
personally. You could try getting out of the elevator yourself, or
purposely keeping your distance if you encounter a woman in an
isolated place. Many of us view that as the modern version of
chivalry.
POSTED SEPT. 5, 1998
D.B.
<DBraunofVA@aol.com>,
Yorktown, VA
FURTHER NOTICE 7:
I think the woman would be scared because people and news
make it sound like black people are real bad and that if you look at
them wrong they will kill you or hit you in the mouth or something
like that. So it makes people think all black people are bad.
POSTED SEPT. 5, 1998
Jeff, Baltimore, MD
FURTHER NOTICE 8:
I would not be afraid unless it was late at night. I must
admit that if there were more than one black man I would be afraid
because of the animosity some blacks have toward whites. Also, even
though blacks are the minority, they commit more violent crimes. That
is what I am told. If that is not right, please set me straight so I
can set my husband (who knows everything) straight.
POSTED SEPT. 9, 1998
White female
To respond
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THE QUESTION:
R441: I`ve noticed that white people tend to go barefoot into
businesses such as supermarkets, 7-11's, etc. Why is that? Is it a
cultural thing? Does it not hurt their feet? Is the skin texture
different from everybody else's?
POSTED SEPT. 2, 1998
E. Ford, 37, black
<QuietS@webtv.net>,
Virginia Beach, VA
ANSWER 1:
I think the answer is simpler than that. You say you are
from Virginia Beach, VA. Whenever I visit the Jersey shore, I notice
that nearly everyone goes barefoot since they are on vacation and
basically relaxing. I imagine that a beach town like Virginia Beach
would be the same way.
POSTED SEPT. 4, 1998
John K., 25, straight Irish-American male,
<the-macs@geocities.com>,
Cranford, NJ
FURTHER NOTICE:
I have done that before and I am white. I did it because I
was too lazy to put my shoes on for just a quick trip in to buy gum
or something. I don't know about the texture on the bottom of my feet
being different or anything. I think it's just laziness.
POSTED SEPT. 4, 1998
Stacy, 20
<stace20@yahoo.com>,
Dallas, TX
FURTHER NOTICE 2:
I'm white, and I would never go into a store barefoot.
There's too much potential for debris, dirt and infection. White feet
develop callouses just like black feet, and hurt no less barefoot. I
live in the Ozarks, and not to knock the Midwest, but I think this is
a subcultural thing rather than a race thing. Many of the people I
have seen barefoot in stores are children of poor, uneducated country
people.
POSTED SEPT. 4 1998
Julie H., white female, MO
FURTHER NOTICE 3:
Most white people do not appear in public with bare feet.
The fact of the matter is, the white people that I know, myself
included, who I have heard voice an opinion on this topic think that
those persons who run around in public without shoes are lower-class
types. As for your other question, I can only speak for myself: My
feet are as tender as any.
POSTED SEPT. 4, 1998
Michell, 31, white, Panama City, FL
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