Best of the
Week
of May 5, 2002Best of Week
Archives
Here are the most intriguing cross-cultural exchanges
either begun or advanced during the week of May 5, 2002, as selected
by Y? Thesepostings, as well as "Best of the Week" entries
from previous weeks, also can be found by accessing Y?'s database
using the search form, or, in the case of
answers posted before April 24, 1999, in the
Original Archives (all questions
from the Original Archives have been entered into the database as
well). In the Original Archives, as well as in the database, you will
find questions that have received answers, as well as questions still
awaiting responses. You are encouraged to answer any questions
relevant to your demographic background, as well as to ask any
provocative question you desire. Answers posted are not necessarily
meant to represent the views of an entire demographic group, but can
provide a window into the insights of an individual from that
group.First-time users should first make a quick stop at Y?'s
guidelines pages for asking and
answering questions.
The book
on Y? is here!
"Why Do White People Smell Like Wet
Dogs
When They Come Out Of The Rain?"
Order it here!
Read the
Associated Press story on "Wet Dogs"
Question:
To non-Christians:
What is your reaction when well-intentioned strangers or
acquaintances wish you a 'Merry Christmas' or 'Happy Easter'? Do you
explain that you're Muslim, Buddhist, Jewish, agnostic, etc., or do
you just let it go?
POSTED 4/29/2002
Sue B., Detroit, MI, United States, 40s, Female, Jewish,
White/Caucasian, Straight, Writer, 4 Years of College, Middle class,
Mesg ID 4292002113436
Responses:
I usually accept and return all greetings in the spirit in which they
are given. Just because I am not a member of a certain faith doesn't
mean I am uncomfortable in the celebration of that holiday (holy
day). I also try to remember and/or observe as many religious
holidays as I am aware of to further my own education of the various
world religions. If someone asks, I tell them that.
POSTED 5/6/2002
A. Adams, Los Angeles, CA, United States, Over 4 Years of College,
Mesg ID 54200280138
I'm agnostic and am not offended at all. The intentions behind
holiday greetings are generally very good, so I consider it a nice
gesture. I work in retail, though, so I don't use religously based
greetings during those times of the year; I worked this Christmas
Eve, and just to cover myself, I said, 'Have a nice holiday.'
POSTED 5/6/2002
Sarah C., San Francisco area, CA, United States, 24, Female,
Agnostic, Asian, Over 4 Years of College, Upper middle class, Mesg ID
562002105336
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Question:
Why is following the
Ten Commandments considered so vital to be a good Jew or Christian,
while at the same time there are other rules in the Book of Exodus
that were given by God that if followed today would be considered
offensive and sacreligious to even the most conservative follower of
the Christian or Jewish faiths? For example, in the book of Exodus
there is a passage in which the Lord gives a law that says that if
somebody is caught doing work on the Sabbath day, he should be put to
death. The issue I have with many devout followers of the Judeo -
Christian way is that they claim one cannot selectively obey some of
God's laws and consider himself or herself a 'moral' person. Are not
these right-wing religious individuals as guilty of obeying God's
rules selectively as are, for example, people who have sex before
marriage but who other than that 'more or less' follow the guidelines
of the Old and the New Testaments?
POSTED 5/6/2002
Mark, Courtenay, NA, Canada, Male, Mesg ID 51200225850
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Question:
Why do some African
Americans feel they are always the victims?
POSTED 5/6/2002
Cookie, Chicago, IL, United States, Mesg ID 51200254753
Responses:
I think people view themselves as victims because they don't want to
own up to some of their responsibilities. Black people do it, just
like teenagers do it. When something is not going right in your life,
for some people it is natural to blame everyone else but themselves.
I am African American and choose to view myself as the opposite of a
victim, because when you are a victim, you are giving someone else
power over you and your life. If more people would take control of
their lives (all types of people) I think there would be less of this
victimization.
POSTED 5/9/2002
Christine, Houston, TX,
United States, 19, Female, Baptist, Black/African American, Straight,
Student, 2 Years of College, Upper middle class, Mesg ID
58200290843
I would hope that we
don't consider ourselves victims. I think that when others hear black
people address injustices that we face DAILY, they misconstrue this
as 'playing the victim.' That comes from not understanding what it is
like to be a black person in America today. I will not allow these
injustices to hold me back or deter me from reaching my goals, and I
hope that others will do the same. Do the same despite how
frustrating it may be. I don't pay much attention to those who have
no idea what it is like to be black, judging my experience as a black
woman. No, we are not being 'victims,' we are simply identifying our
DAILY struggles.
POSTED 5/9/2002
Star, Kansas City, MO,
United States, 24, Female, Baptist, Black/African American, Straight,
RN, Over 4 Years of College, Middle class, Mesg ID
58200293446
Several groups of
humans use victimization as a political tool to gain power. One need
only look to white reverse discrimination claims, gay discrimination
claims and the Middle East conflict for examples. Groups attempting
to gain power have always used victimization arguments to gain the
moral high ground in their quest to forward their political agendas.
And each group comes armed with various degrees of amunition. For
African Americans, that amunition includes slavery, the death of more
than 100 million of our ancesters in the slave trade, the rape of our
women and the complete stripping of our history, sense of cultural
identity, mother tongues and religion. I would submit to you that the
African-American victimization argument is still effective because
African Americans can never forget our past in this country, nor can
we allow others to - or history will continue to repeat itself. And
if reminding folks of the past and pointing out modern-day
incarnations of past practices makes some folks uncomfortable, so be
it, because that is the desired effect.
POSTED 5/9/2002
Kevin, Miami, FL,
United States, Male, Black/African American, Mesg ID
582002114507
The reason I feel some
African Americans feel they are 'victims' is that they are looking
for pity. They want people to give them special treatment because of
their ancestors being enslaved some 500 years ago. I feel that any
group of people who feel like they are victims doesn't have
motivation to advance themselves. They believe everything they were
told early on, that they were thieves, heathens, savages, etc. If
people continue to believe they were heathens and savages, they will
continue to blame society for why they are the way they are. The only
people who can change that ideal of thinking is those individuals.
That's why when certain people, regardless of color, who apply to
work at certain jobs don't get hired, they automatically blame it on
their skin color for why they weren't hired. I find using skin color
is an excuse for people who don't have faith in themselves.
POSTED 5/9/2002
Mitchell, Queens, NY,
United States, Mesg ID 58200251738
Black people have been
put down by other races and within their own race. They strive to do
better and be better, but it is hard when you are constantly judged
because of your color - whether you are walking in a store to get a
drink or going on an interview for a job. Blacks have been the
victims of countless racial acts and putdowns. This is why we feel we
are continually victimized by the media and society.
POSTED 5/9/2002
Kandice G., Rialto, CA,
United States, 19, Female, Christian, Black/African American,
Straight, student, 2 Years of College, Middle class, Mesg ID
58200271029
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Question:
After Sept. 11, my
family members tend to look at Arab people differently and hate even
those who have lived here their whole lives. To me, this is the same
as hating all gays or blacks or priests. I don't feel you can judge a
whole group by a few of its members. I was hoping I could get
responses from Americans and Arabs on how they feel about this and
what is happening in our world.
POSTED 5/6/2002
Nicole B., Mayville, MI, United States, 19, Female, Mesg ID
52200244001
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Question:
What stops guys at
nudist colonies and nude beaches from getting erections all the
time?
POSTED 5/6/2002
Rick, Springfield, OH, United States, Male, Atheist, White/Caucasian,
Straight, Over 4 Years of College, Middle class, Mesg ID
542002123824
Responses:
Most guys are too nervous to get an erection when they first go out
to a nudist beach. Also, once we realize that courtesy requires we
keep control, it's just a matter of concentrating on remaining calm.
And just in case, most people keep a towel with them at all
times.
POSTED 5/9/2002
P.J., Baton Rouge, LA,
United States, Male, White/Caucasian, Straight, Over 4 Years of
College, Mesg ID 57200281021
I thought that way too
until I started going to the nude beach. It is not sexual at all,
even though I was surrounded by some very attractive women. 'Staring'
is very uncool - arousal is not all visual, I think, because I did
not get an erection until I was there once with my girlfriend - when
I saw her nude that was a different story and I had to go into the
water for a while. Give it a try; you'll be surprised at how
liberating it is (wear sunscreen everywhere, though).
POSTED 5/9/2002
Jonah S., Vancouver,
British Colombia, NA, Canada, Male, Mesg ID
58200291938
Really, really, fat
women.
POSTED 5/9/2002
Murray C., Halifax,
Nova Scotia, NA, Canada, 33, Male, Mesg ID
582002120710
The reason men do not
become sexually aroused at nude beaches, or nudist colonies, is that
they are exposed to the nudity on a regular basis. That would be the
basic and short answer. However, this is assuming all men are so
sexually immature that they would become aroused at the mere sight of
a nude woman. Men who do become aroused at the sight of a nude woman
are probably under-sexed or over-sexed. In other words, not really
mature sexually and not well-balanced enough mentally, physically or
emotionally to handle seeing a nude woman. There is a misconception
that men are less capable of handling their sexual desires than
women. Men want women to believe that, but it is not valid. It gives
men an excuse when they've behaved badly. Women of old, and of modern
times, buy into this, and validate the excuse.
POSTED 5/9/2002
H., Lake Ozark, MO,
United States, 35, Female, Spritual - not 'religious',
White/Caucasian, Straight, 4 Years of College, Upper middle class,
Mesg ID 58200231618
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Question:
What is the
difference between a bisexual and a homosexual (who doesn't find
women attractive)? And why are some homosexuals or bisexuals
cross-dressers, while some are Mr. Universe contestants?
POSTED 5/6/2002
Jack P., New York, NY, United States, Male, Mesg ID
54200260851
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