Best of the Week
of Sept. 30, 2001
Best of Week
Archives
Here are the most intriguing cross-cultural exchanges
either begun or advanced during the week of Sept. 30, 2001, as
selected by Y? These postings, as well as "Best of the
Week" entries from previous weeks, also can be found by accessing
Y?'s database using the search form, or, in
the case of answers posted before April 24, 1999, in the
Original Archives (all questions
from the Original Archives have been entered into the new database as
well). In the Original Archives and the new database, you will find
questions that have received answers, as well as questions still
awaiting responses. You are encouraged to answer any questions
relevant to your demographic background, as well as to ask any
provocative question you desire. Answers posted are not necessarily
meant to represent the views of an entire demographic group, but can
provide a window into the insights of an individual from that
group.
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Question:
What do people from other countries think of Americans? Is
there a "stereotypical American"? Do they envy Americans or hate
them?
POSTED 10/3/2001
Ryan, Iowa City, IA, United States, 19, Male, Catholic,
White/Caucasian, Straight, student, High School Diploma, Middle
class, Mesg ID 103200171852
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Question:
I have always wanted to know if having a full sex change from
male to female affects the impact of achieving a fullfilling sex
life. Do people who have done this experience the same sensation that
was experienced before?
POSTED 9/24/2001
Meggy S., Melbourne, AK, Australia,
<blueflash@ozemail.com.au.>, 28, Female, New Thought Movement,
White/Caucasian, Straight, nurse, Over 4 Years of College, Middle
class, Mesg ID 9202001113717
Responses:
I haven't had this experience because I was born female and now
sort of live as a male. However, from friends and information I've
picked up over the years, I'd say it varies. Not the sort of clear
answer you wanted, I suppose. I do know that you have to sign a form
when you go for 'the surgey' stating that you understand that you may
lose sensation partially or totally. Having said that, techniques
have improved over time, and I think more operations are 'successful'
than before. On a more positive note, a lot of women are very happy
with their new genitals and say they can experience orgasm from
penetration alone. This is because the penis is inverted to make the
vagina and so is actually more sensitive than a genetic female's.
Conversely, some transwomen report orgasm from clitoral simulation,
but I think the constructed clitoris is not as sensitive as a genetic
female's because the nerve endings are not all concentrated there -
they are spread throughout the surface of the previous penis and
obviously near the top of the vagina where the glans tissue is
situated. Most people have a fulfilling sex life in whatever form
they choose. They also report having more 'internal' orgasms than
previously, more long-lasting and intense. I guess if you always
believed yourself to be female, finally having a vagina would improve
your sex life, general well-being and self-esteem.
POSTED 10/3/2001
Harry, London, NA, United Kingdom, Mesg ID 103200183746
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Question:
To people of various backgrounds: Are there any types of music,
practices or lifestyle activities that you would like to do or be a
part of but feel you can't because of your culture?
POSTED 10/3/2001
Natalie W., Sale, NA, Australia, <natnat50@hotmail.com>,
Female, Mesg ID 102200122403
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Question:
Are there any white, non-Middle Eastern Americans who have
converted to Islam, not because of having a Muslim spouse, but simply
because they became convinced it was the one true religion? And are
there any native-born, white, non-Middle Eastern American Muslim
families? I realize that many American blacks (and some Hispanics)
have converted to Islam, and some American whites convert to Islam
influenced by a Muslim spouse, but otherwise? Many Americans have
converted to traditional Roman Catholicism (myself included) and
Eastern Orthodoxy - both rather exotic faiths when taken literally
and not adapted to the times - for reasons unrelated to ethnicity or
marriage, and I am curious about whether any have done similarly with
Islam.
POSTED 10/3/2001
Augustine, Columbia, SC, United States, 41, Male, Catholic,
White/Caucasian, Over 4 Years of College, Middle class, Mesg ID
102200123843
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Question:
The terrorist bombing in New York has caused great ripples in
the American spiritual consciousness. There has been a great call for
prayer to God for encouragement. I think that is a good thing. But if
we were to pursue this one more step, and ask the question, 'What
would Jesus do?', how would non-Christians react to the idea of
dropping food on Afghanistan rather than bombs? (1) Giving food and
shelter to those in Afghanistan would be according to Jesus' teaching
of turning the other cheek. (2) Afghanistan is a poor country and has
been struggling many years. Many will starve this winter. (3) The
people and government of Afghanistan were not responsible for the
bombing. (4) In the war on terrorism (like fighting a ghost), the
people of America will gain allies in Afghanistan by meeting their
needs. The bombing was a terrible event, but an eye for an eye will
not bring back anyone and will only cause further escalation. How
would Christian and non-Christian people feel about responding in
love, rather than reacting in hatred?
POSTED 9/25/2001
Ronald V., Edmonton, Alberta, NA, Canada, Male, Christian, Mesg
ID 9252001115039
Responses:
I'd like to clarify that we're not 'dropping bombs on
Afghanistan,' we're targeting Al Queda and other terrorist
organizations, and if the Taliban decide they want to be their army,
we'll fight them, too. Having said that, we do have an important
responsibility to the people and governments of the region. Right now
there are thousands of Afghan refugees camped at the border of
Pakistan because they're afraid of what's coming next. We have to
stop turning our noses up at U.N. humanitarian efforts and give them
the money to feed, clothe and vaccinate these people. When we're done
with this mission, we should be invested in helping this region out.
So if by 'dropping bombs' you mean excising terrorist organizations
from afghanistan, I think we should do both.
POSTED 9/26/2001
J. Fleming, Chicago, IL, United States, Male, Atheist,
White/Caucasian, Lower middle class, Mesg ID 9262001120300
This would be an excellent idea, and I would agree. I recently
read an article by Kent Madin titled, 'Bomb Them With Butter' that
spoke of some of the same things you mentioned in your posting. Madin
states, 'A military response, particulary an attack on Afghanistan,
is exactly what the terrorists want. It will strengthen and swell
their small-but-fanatical ranks.' The sad thing is war is inevitable.
You also mentioned prayer. Well, I find it interesting that the same
people who voted prayer out of the schools were the same people
asking everyone to stop doing what it was they were doing at noon a
few weeks ago and pray. Everyone was saying 'God Bless America.'
Strange how He wasn't an issue until tragedy struck. Hmmm. 'War is
not the answer, only love can conquer hate' - Marvin Gaye
POSTED 9/28/2001
Lisa, Detroit, MI, United States, 39, Female, Christian,
Black/African American, Straight, 2 Years of College, Middle class,
Mesg ID 9272001120432
I believe you will see a huge division in what one popular prophet
said and how closely his modern devotees adhere to his teachings. If
you can, assume this perspective: The Christ figure was, for his day,
an anarchist. He drew attention to the 'God-lessness' of the
religious power structure at that time. You will witness the same
dynamics now as then. Those who have the 'hand-up' on God's thoughts
will define the situation to keep themselves and their lifestyles the
way they are - not necessarily they way they should be. Drop bread,
not bombs: too spiritual a thought for the current earth plane. This
does not mean your answer is not a higher choice. Maybe your voice
should reach more ears. And don�t forget that this is just my humble
response to your question.
POSTED 9/30/2001
Matthew, New York City, NY, United States, 43, Male,
White/Caucasian, Mesg ID 927200160502
What if one or more of your loved ones died on Sept. 11 as a
result of the attack? What if they were one of the several who leapt
to their deaths from the Twin Towers? What if they were still lying
under all that rubble? What if their remains will never be found?
Would your opinion be the same? I think not. Retaliation is not hate,
it's justice. Read your Bible; the Old Testament is full of God's
wrath on heathen countries. There are times when war is necessary.
POSTED 9/30/2001
Redeemed One, Newport News, VA, United States, 53, Female,
Baptist, Black/African American, HR Field Rep, Over 4 Years of
College, Mesg ID 928200153710
I am really getting tired of everyone saying 'America is hated,'
'We should solve this with love,' blah blah blah. That is like
telling a rape victim she deserved it because she flaunted herself.
Basically, whether we give food or not to Afghanistan, they are still
going to hate us and think our motives are suspect. The idea that we
can 'love them into alliance' is beyond belief to me. Why don't some
of these people who think we can do this head over there and announce
that they are Americans and we are there to 'help them' - well, the
Afghans would stone them to death. The Taliban has allowed bin Laden
to be in that country for years, and they have been warned that if he
did anything, they would be held responsible. It's not like this is a
surprise to them. I just want to feel safe in my own country again,
and if it takes military action, so be it. By the way, the United
States does give millions of dollars in aid every year to countries
all over the world. Some of that is tax money that I work for,
Ronald, so if I want some of mine to be used to keep me safe, I don't
think Canadians have anything to say about it. THEY started this, and
WE are going to finish it, one way or the other. P.S. Jesus wasn't
exactly a wimp. Did he turn the other cheek when the temple was being
used for trade? No, he broke the place up.
POSTED 9/30/2001
Annie, Omaha, NE, United States, Female, Mesg ID 928200181123
An interesting question with some interesting replies. A Christian
is someone who believes Jesus Christ was the Son of God and follows
His teachings. So the Christian response would be based on the Sermon
on the Mount, which contradicts and supersedes much of the Old
Testament. For a Christian to selectively quote from the Bible to
justify actions while ignoring the spirit of the teachings of Christ
is in my opinion hypocritical. However, I�m not a Christian, although
I was raised as one (and I�m glad I was).
POSTED 10/1/2001
Oisin, London, NA, United Kingdom, Agnostic, Mesg ID
1012001100725
The world is a brutal back alley and does not solve its
differences by 'force of logic.' If it did, the planes wouldn't have
been turned into guided missiles and people would be alive today
whose only crime was to get to work on time Sept. 11. Name me one
case, just one, in which any country has fed someone into being their
friend! Do not kid yourself. The statutory authority in Afghanistan
is the Taliban, they have sheltered an enemy of our way of life, and
they have reacted consistent with the belief that they knew this
attack was going to happen in advance. U.S. history is replete with
regimes that have misunderstood American resolve. All I can say is
that the United States' former enemies (Japan, Germany) became some
of the most successful countries on Earth after we whipped them and
built them up.
POSTED 10/1/2001
Steve, Houston, TX, United States, 45, Male, White/Caucasian,
Still On the Top Floor of a Skyscraper, Over 4 Years of College,
Upper class, Mesg ID 1012001114057
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Question:
In one word, what was it like the first time you had sex? One
of the best answers I have gotten is "overwhelming," but I thought I
would ask a larger crowd. More than one word is fine, but a single
word would be best.
POSTED 9/28/2001
Genny, Jacksonville, FL, United States,
<genny_braynt@hotmail.com>, Female, Methodist, White/Caucasian,
Bisexual, Student, Less than High School Diploma, Upper middle class,
Mesg ID 927200142330
Responses:
Awkward.
POSTED 10/3/2001
Alex, Beloit, WI, United States, Mesg ID 101200111029
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Question:
Why do Afghanistan women have to cover their faces?
POSTED 9/30/2001
Penny M., Melbourne, NA, Australia, Female, Mesg ID
928200164803
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Question:
Why do people self-mutilate? Is it attention seeking? Cultural?
A mental disability?
POSTED 9/30/2001
Kellie, Melbourne, NA, Australia, 21, Female, 4 Years of
College, Middle class, Mesg ID 929200170428
Responses:
I don't belief self-mutilation is any of those things. When I was
17 and 18, I used to cut my forearms, upper arms and breasts very
often. I would say that I was so severely depressed that the pain of
the cutting was the only thing that made me feel something but numb.
I used to think of the Nine Inch Nails song that went, 'I hurt myself
today to see if I still feel; I focus on the pain, the only thing
that's real.' It sounds melodramatic, but when you can't even bring
yourself to get out of bed or take a shower, it makes a lot of sense.
I used to cut myself mostly when I was very angry or completely
despairing. The cuts weren't very deep, though I did know people who
cut (or burned) themselves more severely than I did. I was not
seeking attention; in fact, I went to great pains to hide my cutting.
I was not mentally disabled, unless you count severe depression. You
might call it cultural; there are certain groups of young people who
struggle with mental illness who seem more prone to self-injuring. I
had one friend who even told me which kind of knives were best. In
the end, a nurse at my college's health clinic saw my cuts and sent
me to a psychiatrist. I haven't done it in years, though for a long
time after, the urge would come back whenever I was very, very upset
or hurt. I can say that, eight years or so later, it has completely
stopped.
POSTED 10/1/2001
Sanvean, Lansing, MI, United States, <sanvean@bigfoot.com>,
25, Female, Catholic, White/Caucasian, Straight, 4 Years of College,
Middle class, Mesg ID 101200195935
I've known many who 'cut.' What I've observed thus far is that
their self-esteem is rock-bottom (self-hatred, you could say),
they're very dissatisfied with their lives and they want a break in
the monotony. Cutting provides a cheap thrill (the kind you get from
breaking windows or giving yourself a do-it-yourself tattoo with a
knitting needle), and possibly has something to do with momentarily
boosting serotonin levels (the neurochemical that Prozac increases).
It's also an expression of self-hatred, and is sort of a catharsis
taken out on one's self, sort of like how an abusive father who has a
lousy day at work comes home and beats his kids. I've found that some
also do it to make a statement to those around them, doing it on
their hands and forearms so people will notice. This statement can
either be 'I don't give a f***,' 'look at me, I'm terrible' or 'help
me.' I don't recall the protocol for responding to cutting, but
hopefully another poster will know it (a list was once published on
what and what not to do).
POSTED 10/3/2001
Dan, Los Angeles, CA, United States, 22, Male, Pentecostal,
Hispanic/Latino, Student, 2 Years of College, Lower middle class,
Mesg ID 102200170113
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Question:
Which European country believes women who have not shaved their
armpits or legs are considered sexy by men? What is the essence that
make these women more appealing? Is hygiene an issue?
POSTED 9/28/2001
Djoanna, Melbourne, Victoria, NA, Australia, Female, Catholic,
Asian, Straight, student, 2 Years of College, Mesg ID
9272001112549
Responses:
I've traveled in Ireland, England, France, Spain, Italy, Austria,
Switzerland, Germany (obviously), Denmark, Bulgaria, Romania and
Poland. I have encountered 'hairy' women in German-speaking countries
and former Eastern Block countries - where they are considered to be
completely 'natural' - but the majority of women now shave their legs
and armpits in all the above listed countries. I would not say they
are considered 'more appealing.' I must confess I do not understand
the part of your question about hygiene, because to me shaving the
armpits is a matter of aesthetics and not hygiene. I am, however,
also aware of the feminist position according to which hairlessness
is part of a pre-pubescent body in Western culture and thus a shaved
(artificially hairless) beauty ideal propagates an image of women as
sexually (and by implication mentally) immature, and adolescent. But
personally, I think the 'unnaturalness' of shaving body hair is part
of a great many 'unnatural' things termed 'culture' and 'beauty.'
POSTED 10/1/2001
T., Munich, NA, Germany, 32, Atheist, White/Caucasian, Straight,
Over 4 Years of College, Upper middle class, Mesg ID 9302001105112
If hygiene were an issue, men would shave their armpits, too.
POSTED 10/1/2001
Jerry, Tampa, FL, United States, 68, Male, Over 4 Years of
College, Middle class, Mesg ID 101200195025
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Question:
Concerning the scarring I see on African faces, which are
primarily to a pattern or form, are they a tribal requirement for
class, gender or warrior status? If the intention is to create a
lifelong mark, how is it performed?
POSTED 9/26/2001
Roger, Melbourne, NA, Australia,
<rogerh@net-tech.com.au>, 43, Male, Atheist, White/Caucasian,
Straight, Health, 4 Years of College, Middle class, Mesg ID
9252001111333
Responses:
Having lived in Africa for two years, I know that Africans
distinguish one tribe from another by facial scars. It is not a class
distinction primarily, but secondarily, in that one tribe may look up
or down at another tribe. This is done for both boys and girls. At a
very young age, the children are literally 'brandedI hope this helps.
POSTED 10/1/2001
Ronald V., Edmonton, Alberta, NA, Canada, Male, Christian, Over 4
Years of College, Mesg ID 1012001114301
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Question:
Will African Americans treat whites better than we treated
them, when they outnumber whites 2 to 1 and rule the United
States?
POSTED 9/26/2001
Luther H. R., Long Beach, MS, United States, Male, Mesg ID
925200112035
Responses:
By 2050 it's estimated blacks will be 13.2 percent (including
black Hispanics), Asians 13.2 percent, Hispanics 24.3 percent (the
'brown' ones), and white (including white Hispanics)52.8 percent. So
I really don't know where you get your figures from (I got them from
the U.S. Censue Bureau), but at least till 2050 it's estimated that
whites will still be the racial majority, while Hispanics will be the
ethnic majority (white, brown and black Hispanics put together).
Anyhow, the day a race is the majority in The Ivy League Colleges and
Universities, that day it will rule.
POSTED 9/30/2001
Nelson A., Caracas, NA, Venezuela, 32, Male, White (ethnicity:
Hispanic/Latino), Lawyer/Business, Over 4 Years of College, Mesg ID
926200153228
I doubt it.
POSTED 9/30/2001
Matthew, New York City, NY, United States, 43, Male,
White/Caucasian, Mesg ID 927200154450
If black people ever attained the economic and social power over
whites that we have historically had over them, I expect some
ill-gotten revenge will be enacted. Black rage, slavery reperations,
race riots ... a bulk of the black race is not over history yet and
would like to enact their own 'equality' for a few years. I can
understand the anger. I can even agree on some levels. But I will
also be on the front lines when these battles are played out in the
future. They are certainly entitled to take what I have because of
how my ancestors have taken from them, but I won't give it up without
a fight.
POSTED 9/30/2001
Seamus, Charlestown, MA, United States, 22, Male, Catholic,
White/Caucasian, landscape company, 2 Years of College, Lower class,
Mesg ID 928200135005
I'd expect not, but that's a hypothetical notion, anyway. At
present, blacks account for 11 percent of the population and whites
account for a little more than half. Unless you're one of those
racists who like to portray blacks as 'breeders,' I don't see how,
failing a mass migration to the United States, that blacks or any
ethnic group would somehow pull ahead of the pack in their rate of
population growth. I hope the future of the United States can be the
melting pot we've often heard about but never seen, with our distinct
society shared-in equally and not dismissed as the product of
Eurocentric indoctrination as some demagogues would characterize it,
but as the lineage of man's pursuit of civilization that began in
Egypt and continues through into the future. It's just growing pains,
man, just growing pains.
POSTED 9/30/2001
Justin, Chicago, IL, United States, Male, Atheist,
White/Caucasian, 2 Years of College, Lower middle class, Mesg ID
928200142415
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