Best of the Week
of Dec. 17, 2000
Best of Week
Archives
Here are the most intriguing cross-cultural exchanges
either begun or advanced during the week of Dec. 17, 2000, as
selected by Y? These postings, as well as "Best of the
Week" entries from previous weeks, also can be found by accessing
Y?'s new database using the search form,
or, in the case of answers posted before April 24, 1999, in
the Original Archives (all
questions from the Original Archives have been entered into
the new database as well). In the Original Archives and the new
database, you will find questions that have received answers, as well
as questions still awaiting responses. You are encouraged to answer
any questions relevant to your demographic background, as well as to
ask any provocative question you desire. Answers posted are not
necessarily meant to represent the views of an entire demographic
group, but can provide a window into the insights of an individual
from that group.
First-time users should first make a quick stop at Y?'s
guidelines pages for asking and
answering questions.
The book
on Y? is here!
"Why Do White People Smell Like Wet
Dogs
When They Come Out Of The Rain?"
Order it securely via credit card
Delivery in 2-3 days via Priority Mail
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Question:
What does it mean when people say someone is "high
maintenance"?
POSTED 12/11/2000
D. Williams, Miami, FL, United States, 18, Female, Christian,
Black/African American, Straight, High School Diploma , Middle class
Mesg ID 1130200025303
Responses:
It's a term lazy, non-communicative men made up because they don't
know and/or don't care how to please a woman. They are only concerned
about themselves. When a man mentions the phrase "high-maintenance,"
I get away from him instantly. Anything valued and worth having, in
my book, is high-maintenance.
POSTED 12/19/2000
Anonymous, n/a, FL, United States, 38, Female
Mesg ID 12172000110901
To
respond
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Question:
I'm a white male raised primarily around whites, but I've seen
and interacted with people of many races. I have no hatred or reason
to look down on other races, but when I encounter a group of black,
Hispanic or Asian men, I feel somewhat inferior. I worry what they
think about me, and I assume they don't like me or find me annoying.
I can never truly express my sense of humor - this may sound petty,
but I feel un-hip, like a joke to them. I am the stupid honky to
them. Do black or Asian or Hispanic people notice this behavior in
white men? Do any whites feel similar?
POSTED 12/19/2000
Jeff, Edmonton, Alberta, NA, Canada, 18, Male, Atheist,
White/Caucasian, Straight, High School Diploma , Middle class
Mesg ID 1217200021203
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respond
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Question:
Why do Americans feel so strongly about the right to bear arms?
Is the United States not the only country with such a law among the
G20?
POSTED 12/19/2000
Walter P., Montreal, Quebec, NA, Canada, 37, Male, Catholic,
White/Caucasian, Straight, Engineer, Over 4 Years of College , Upper
middle class
Mesg ID 12192000100550
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respond
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Question:
What would be the most inoffensive way for a gay male to
approach or solicit a straight male in the hope of prospective sex?
POSTED 12/20/1999
James S., Vero Beach, FL, United States, Male
Mesg ID 12199942148
Responses:
If he were truly a straight male, there is NO way to do that
without the risk of being offensive. I'm offended you are even
considering it. Without knowing a person, it can be taken as quite
offensive to solicit sex from anyone. Go to Las Vegas, where you can
purchase what you need.
POSTED 12/19/2000
Sheila, West Palm Beach, FL, United States, 50, Female, Agnostic,
White/Caucasian, Lesbian, G/L/B/T Youth Director, Over 4 Years of
College
Mesg ID 1221199994654
It's a tough question because, as you know, there are a lot of
homophobes out there, and you never know how they will react to you.
When that has happened to me, I usually say something like, 'Sorry,
I'm straight, but I appreciate the compliment.' Unfortunately, not
everyone responds like that. Better to wait somehow to figure out
what the story is. Why put yourself at risk because of someone else's
sexual hangups? Better safe than sorry.
POSTED 12/19/2000
Andy, Los Angeles, CA, United States, <Moutonxxx@aol.com>,
33, Male, Jewish, White/Caucasian, Straight, 4 Years of College
Mesg ID 1223199922234
Why are you trying to engage in such self-destructive behavior? I
have seen several friends and aquaintances play this little game, and
in my opinion, it's futile. I don't understand the psychology of why
gay men do this (perhaps it's similar to straight men's obsession
with lesbians?) If you're looking for non-stereotypical gay guys,
trust me, they're out there serving in the police departments and
military, just as butch as can be. Leave the straight guys for the
women.
POSTED 12/19/2000
S., Fort Worth, TX, United States, 24, Male, Episcopalian,
White/Caucasian, Gay, Aviation/Military Police, Technical School ,
Lower middle class
Mesg ID 12241999122105
To
respond
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Question:
Why do people say "axed" instead of "asked"? Is this a
deliberate changing of the word, or has it just been mispronounced
for a really, really long time? Also, what is going on with "hisself"
instead of "himself"?
POSTED 12/19/2000
Tina G., Birmingham, MI, United States,
<tinag@hfmgv.org>, 24, Female, Atheist, White/Caucasian,
Exhibit designer, Over 4 Years of College , Middle class
Mesg ID 12182000102733
To
respond
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Question:
What do people think of women in sports, especially women in
'guy' sports? I ask because I've been getting into hockey lately, and
many of my friends are kind of shocked because I'm usually so
ladylike, but I've been getting more aggressive now that I've been
watching it on TV. And I've been noticing that there aren't many
women's leagues in any sport. Why is this? Are women still
'delicate,' as they were thought to be in the early 1900s? Why is it
unwomenly to get into guy sports? Is there still gender bias in
sports? Which sports?
POSTED 12/19/2000
Kate, Seattle, WA, United States, 13, Female, White/Caucasian,
Less than High School Diploma
Mesg ID 1218200064537
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respond
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Question:
What is the proper way to raise a child with Down Syndrome? And
how do you treat a child with Down Syndrome?
POSTED 12/19/2000
Melissa, Swampscott, MA, United States, 17, Female,
White/Caucasian, student, Less than High School Diploma
Mesg ID 1218200091014
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respond
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Question:
Why do young people (high school/college-aged) wear sweats and
ripped jeans to school? According to some of my professors and my
parents, young university students used to dress neatly, girls in
skirts and guys in suits, some 30-plus years ago. Why can't people my
age do that? Sometimes the clothes students wear around campus
disgust me. We should learn how to be proper ladies and gentlemen if
we are to succeed in the world.
POSTED 12/14/2000
C.C., Somewhere, NA, Canada, 21, Female, Anglican, Asian,
Straight, university student, 2 Years of College , Upper middle class
Mesg ID 1214200031308
Responses:
I would guess that many of us have little or no desire to be
'proper ladies and gentlemen.' This is a different era; it's more
acceptable to dress comfortably or even grubbily, and because most of
our contact on campus is with friends and peers, why put on airs? I
would hate to sit through a college lecture in tight, itchy pantyhose
or a starched shirt.
POSTED 12/20/2000
S.R., Austin, TX, United States, 22, Female, Humanist, Straight,
Over 4 Years of College
Mesg ID 1215200081521
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respond
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