Dare to ask: Catholics and use of birth control

By Phillip Milano

Question

If Catholics don't believe in contraceptives, how do they keep from having a lot of kids?

Linzi, 17, Selinsgrove, Penn.

Replies

It's all about timing.

Betty, 30, Catholic, Jacksonville

The method taught at my church uses the woman's temperature to find out when she ovulates. I know when I'm fertile. That means that my husband and I abstain from sex every other week - one week because I am fertile, the other because I feel disgusting.

Cindy, 31, Catholic, Pittsburgh

Not every Catholic toes the line on what the Church says we should do. Different parishes will be more conservative or liberal. And it isn't like we have to send in surveys every year saying we do or don't use birth control. There are Catholics who use birth control, just like there are non-Catholics who do.

Melissa, 23, Catholic, Jacksonville

There are other methods that do not destroy a fertilized egg, but prevent one from forming. Just because the church teaches against contraceptives doesn't mean Catholics aren't using them.

Arnold, Christian, Edmonton, Canada

Expert says

It wasn't long ago - like maybe nine months before May 29, 1962 - that some Catholic family counselors (at least one) were actually advising some of their parishioners (at least one couple) that they should enlarge their family. Some people who author the Dare to Ask column but prefer to remain anonymous owe their existence to these counselors, but that doesn't mean they have a biased, favorable, fist-pumping view of Catholics who enlarge their families.

The Catholic Church says artificial birth control is a no-no; it says to use Natural Family Planning, said Theresa Notare of the Natural Family Planning Program of the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops. This involves testing basal body temperature, cervical mucus changes and other neat or messy things to see when the woman is fertile.

The FDA says this is typically about 80 percent effective, though Notare said studies show effectiveness can reach 99 percent if couples train well and follow the rules religiously (OK, she said "closely").

"We have a theology of responsible parenthood . . . the Church has never said, 'Have as many kids as you can absolutely have,' " she said. "We say that sex is for bonding and for new life, but children have to be cared for and loved."

By the way, the average U.S. Catholic family is about the same size as the national average, around 2.6 people. In fact, 11 percent of Catholic families have three or more children, only slightly above the national average of 9 percent, according to the Pew Forum's 2007 U.S. Religious Landscape Survey. The fact that polls show about eight in 10 Catholics are OK with artificial birth control might have something to do with that.

Phillip Milano, author of I Can't Believe You Asked That! (Perigee), moderates cross-cultural dialogue at Y? The National Forum on People's Differences. Visit www.yforum.com to submit questions and answers. Send general column comments to phillip.milano@jacksonville.com. You can also hear his podcasts or watch his TV spots.